Hi. My father has been battling cancer for 5 years now. At first, there were many ups, but within the past year, it has all turned into downs. He has started chemotherapy and has started losing his hair now. This is taking its toll on him and he is getting very depressed. This scares me because I'm afraid that he is about to lose his will to live. Just pray for the best.
Eric

Having lost mine I know just how special Dads are. I will definately keep yours in my thoughts and prayers.
Finnr

had a friend who went thru chemo twice, they wrapped his head in a damp towel and he kept hair the second time. for what its worth.

Thanks for the prayers and the tips. I called today and Dad is doing a lot of sleeping now. I think I'll mention the damp towel idea. Yeah, each parent has their own special place in our lives and hearts.

He is on the list here.

Ecart many other have had similar things happen to them. But what you feel is yours alone. Only you know how this is affecting you. An in part you can have an impact on how it feels to you. If you are up to it maybe it would be in order for you to have a serious talk to your dad and let him know how you feel and find out how he feels. At times people would like some things taken care of before they pass. If he has issues maybe you could be the one to resolve them. Make a list and as you cross them off get back to him. This will allow some peace to him and he will be assured that you are the one to carry the family strength forward. You seem to believe the time is near and I believe it should be as easy as possible for him to let go. He has earned the right to leave. That sure does not make it easy for those that care about him, that pain is horrible. It makes us feel so helpless. But the time and how you feel about it will make a difference in you. One thing we already know about you is that you are willing to allow us into your life at a crucial time. Your ability to do that will be important now. Confide in someone about your feelings. I feel that a person too close is not the right person. Some one as I say a step to the side is who I would select. One that knows you but not real close but also someone willing. I had to seek professional help in the past. Close friends were really valuable but no all I needed. Your call do what feels right for you. You may have to portray a strong person in the days ahead. Do not let that stop you from grieving in a way that suits you. Good luck.

Eric perhaps cheer him up with having him tell you stories about when he was young, maybe stories about you when you were a child. I'm sure that will bring back good memories for him :)

Thanks for the prayers and advice. We are spending vacation together this year. Mom and Dad live in Georgia now but when Dad was growing up here in NC, he spent a lot of time at White Lake. We did not know that when we started checking into vacationing there. He is excited about going and it is supposed to be between his treatments. But if it turns out that he can't go, then we'll go to their house instead. Either way, I'll make certain to throw him in the truck and take him for a ride or something to spend some special time with him.
I haven't given up hope yet, but I also have enough common sense to prepare for the worst. It's kind of a strange place to be. When I talk about it with my wife, I get speechless (which rarely happens ). She asks what I am thinking or feeling and I really can't tell her. I really don't know. It's not easy to sort through everything.

I am sorry to hear what your family is going through, it is always a tough thing to deal with.
My father is still alive but I went through it with my grandfather when I was younger, I know the pain.
Your father will be in my prayers.

welder19

All too often we get the idea that we are the only one facing things like this, but then we get reminded that there are plenty of people who know our pain because they have already been there.
Thanks welder19.

Recently lost my father to cancer. It's not a good experience watching them waste away and there is not a lot you can do to ease their suffering. During the last few weeks he knew that the game was over and it was difficult for him to hide his dissapointment.
It is natural for you to get angry with your father for dying, hide this from him and be as patient with him as you can.

Thanks for sharing that imagedude. One thing that is hardest on my father is for me to see him this weak. He has always been strong and able. Now he has to stand back and let me take the lead. Although I am in my late thirties, he still remembers the little boy that idolized him and had to have his help. Now he's the one needing help and it's hard on him.

I sent a prayer to the Father to send his love and blessings to all....Duck

Hi sfduck, sorry I didn't see this sooner. Thank you for your care and concern.
But on with an update. My father, George, passed away yesterday from pneumonia. I have lost a father, a hero and my best friend. But I know where he is and I'll see him again one day.
Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers. I talked with him briefly, and told him that I was proud of him and proud to be his son and that I love him. He will always be with me. He was a special kind of person.
Thanks,
Ecart

Ecart, my heart goes out to you. I know how badly I miss my Dad.
Finnr

Our condolences to you and your family. To loose a family member and mentor is tough, but take comfort in the good times you had, and the knowledge he has has tried to pass on to you.

Thanks for the kind words. Today was the viewing of the body. I got to hear from so many people just how much my father has impacted their lives. That really did me a lot of good.
I am remembering things that were long forgotten now, memories that should never have been forgotten. But I rest in them and let them bring a smile to my face.

So, sorry for the loss.

2 pieces of advice:
drink to remember, never to forget.
and Though it might be tough, write down as much as you can remember now that the memories have been refreshed in your mind. You will be very glad in the future that you did.

Ecart, I am sorry to hear about your father. I lost my father a little over a year ago and I can tell you that it will get better. I still miss daddy and, once in a while, I catch myself reaching for the phone to call and ask him a question. Then, I smile and remember that he is not sick anymore.

Thanks Candid, I am going to sit down very soon and write a tribute to my father. It'll be something that I can pass on to my children and they can have some recorded memories of their grandfather.
Leah, I'm spending a lot of time in his shop now, because I feel close to him there. But later this week, I'll be back home and won't be able to take that time. There are many questions that I could ask him now. But he's physically not here any more. But like you, I rest assured that he is not sick any more. I told him when he died that we would be there soon enough, just wait for us a while.