Feeling really down today.

[Frosty]

I hope the tread's title doesn't alarm anybody but today wasn't a good one. We had to make the hardest decision a dog person can.

I've talked about Abby, Deb's retired service dog, one of the if not THE best dog I've ever lived with. She's been getting old, hasn't gotten around to well in the last couple years, about 3 months we stopped letting her come up stairs to sleep with us. It was just to hard on her, especially coming down in the morning. She'd finally resigned herself to sleeping downstairs, I hated making her stay apart but it was hurting her too badly. 

She started throwing up her meals Friday,  then didn't want to eat Saturday night and only ate a few pieces Sunday morning, nothing Sunday night nor this morning. We took her in at 11:00 this morning and had her put down. 

It's been 3 hrs now, my eyes have cleared enough to see to type. You may not hear from me for a while, I have 13 years of good times to live again. I refuse to remember her the last time I saw her.

Later guys, I'm going to cry for a while.

Frosty The Lucky.

 

[pnut]

I'm so sorry. At least you did the unselfish thing. Time is the only salve for this wound. Take care. 

Pnut

[Glenn]

Frosty it is always difficult to know when to make that decision and even more difficult to actually make the decision.  You, Deb and Abby's friends are on the list. 

[Marc1]

Been there, done that. I feel for you. 
At some stage I found some relief in a 2017 movie called "A dog's purpose" 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n1p5T5NM1eg

Love you Frosty

 

[ThomasPowers]

Caring for *their* needs over our own; best master you can be!

[Latticino]

Limiting your pet's suffering is the key, as far as I'm concerned as well.  I think most of us have been there also.  It is always hard.  My sympathies.

[Frosty]

Love that movie Marc, watching the trailer helped, thanks.

Frosty The Lucky.

[SLAG]

Jer,

I just strayed onto this thread.

Total bummer.

Marg and I extend our deepest condolences for your loss.

Extended to you, to Deb, and all the other denizens in your household.

Letting go and being left with 'just' memories is always tough.

She had thirteen good years with two of the best and most compassionate folks in Alaska.

Hang in there good guy.

SLAG &  Marg,   

(the marvelous).

[George N. M.]

Dear Frosty,

I know exactly how you feel but I fully expect that all the furry folk I've known will be waiting for me on the other side and wanting to know why it took me so long to get there and did I bring any treats and if not, why not.  I feel that knowing when to end our furry family members' suffering and pain is the last, best gift we can give them.  You all are in my prayers.

George

[1forgeur]

It's a shame that however dogs came to be, the one that created them didn't allow for them to live longer. I like to think He needs dogs too! I'll say hi to her in the fall when I can see the dog star again along with my old buddies. Take care

[ThomasPowers]

Remember the Vet as well; they are not in it for the money---Med School is easier to get in and a human Dr makes a LOT more money!  It hurts them to put down an animal too.

[Chris C]

I really feel for you, Frosty.  That's one of the most difficult decisions a person can have to make.  I've been there and done that so many times with intimate pets as well as many (too many to count) Llamas I've had to put down that I can really relate.  Go heal, relive those good years, cry until you can't cry any more..........it won't be over soon. 

[John McPherson]

13 hours ago, 1forgeur said:

It's a shame that however dogs came to be, the one that created them didn't allow for them to live longer. 

Some one once said that we are elves to dogs: we live incredibly long lives, do things that they can not comprehend, have seemingly magical powers, and have the ability to do things for them that they could never do for themselves.

I rate a person on how they treat dogs, children, cleaning crews, and waitstaff.

[Frosty]

Thanks guys, I'm feeling better after a night's sleep though it took a couple drams of the single malt to help break me out of being angry at any and everything. I've spent some time writing emails to friends and relatives about letting her go and found I could better remember the good and magic times by writing about them. 

It's easier this morning to feel good her misery is over. There's this giant hole she left in our lives though so I think I'll administer a little self prescribed therapy and let you guys in on some of my memories.

The first is one of Abby's magical abilities. The first day we met her in the animal shelter we saw her magic in action. After saying hi through the fence we took her for a walk, no sooner had we taken her through the gate someone else came down the hall with a prospective rescue dog who was pretty agitated and she moved the dog close to her right side and eased over. Abby only looked and as they approached the other dog calmed down and they both wagged tails in passing, the other dog remained calm and was adopted. 

As we walked Abby to the get to know your new dog room, the usually noisy dogs quieted down as we passed. We spent maybe 10 minutes in the get acquainted room listening to the other shelter dogs getting louder so we experimented by walking her through the entire facility. We left quiet calm dogs in our path, we own cats so we took her into the cat room where THEY calmed down and got quiet.  Feral cats sniffed noses with her through the cages, some started purring. 

I was gobsmacked, the gal from the shelter who was with us was amazed as well and we left with her about 20 minutes later. She curled up in the back seat and slept till we pulled into our driveway and she looked around. Waited patiently till deb snapped the lead on and only got out when invited. Walked around the place a little to let her take a pee or whatever then headed into the house. Bonnie, Deb's skittish Border Collie and both cats she'd brought north with her from the UP of Michigan made a skirmish line inside. Abby came in and everybody calmed right down, even Bonnie who was NEVER calm, even sleeping. Abby jumped up on the love seat for the one and only time she willingly got on furniture and laid there for maybe 5 minutes while the house pack checked her out. That was it, she was family.

The Pygmy goats took to her on sight and goats NEVER take to dogs that quickly, they're wolves and goats are prey but the silly little dears lined up at the fence to sniff noses immediately.  It was almost weird. 

Abby weighed about 55 lbs.+/- and long coated so when Deb started developing "Fibro myalgia" then "Poly Myalgia" she needed a wheel chair to get around so I pushed her shopping when her arms wore out. There are places where a dog only needs to be reasonably well behaved like Home Depot or the real hardware store so we took her with. Abby was a natural, Deb would wrap her lead on the wheel chair arm rest ad Abby broke trail while pulling. It took about 2 outings to teach Abby left and right, she already knew stop, okay Abby was go.

Later as Deb overcame the Poly and she could walk more than a few minutes, Abby provided stability, we called her Deb's studded, four paw, cane and she earned her service dog certifications in record time. She was always an unofficial therapy dog, I think she was radioactive, she radiated: love me and all is well where ever she went

Many a time Abby would be towing Deb's shopping cart, breaking trail. There was never an angry or put out expression when Abby slipped up next to someone and sort of herded them out of the way, only smiles and requests to pet her. The service dog vest was the topper, folks happily cleared a path. There we'd be in a store, WallyWorld or Fred Meyer usually and suddenly Abby would veer off down a different isle towing us along. Invariably there'd be someone hurting, usually someone in a wheel chair having a bad time, often a disabled Vet but Autistic kids or just a crying child. She'd walk up to them and brush her shoulder into them if standing or lay her chin on a knee if sitting. In seconds you could see and feel the hurt leave them.

When I was in the hospital after the accident, Deb got them to take me outside if for no better reason than to get out of the room. Deb met us with Abby outside and Abby started checking me out though I was wrapped in pink sheets like a Tamale in corn husks so she didn't recognize me but Deb said to say hi so she did as bid. She nosed under the sheet to my arm and started wagging her whole body, it was ME!

They had me strapped down as securely as possible, I was a problem patient, I did nothing but try to escape from violence to bribery I just wanted to get out of there. Not that I remember, the Me was hiding somewhere the docs couldn't find. I nearly freaked the attendants out when I got my arm loose, I had a record of escaping within a few seconds of getting a hand loose. This time however I patted Abby's head then started stroking and scratching her ears and said the first coherent thing I had in weeks. "You're a good dog Abby. I love you"

I guess we spent quite a bit more time outside than originally planned but before we headed back in the doctor in charge of me said Abby had free access to me at any time anywhere other than surgery. The next morning I came back, became aware and could hold lucid conversations. I remember that moment and most of what came after. Whether I could see her r not I could feel if Abby was in the room, I felt better. Unfortunately Abby couldn't spend as much time with me as I would've liked, she had to make room calls. Every patient wanted a visit from Abby some of the most distressed patients were better just from her presence let alone some hands on. 

Ahhh, I feel much better for the memories. Thanks for the patience guys. More later.

Frosty The Lucky.

[Irondragon Forge ClayWorks]

Frosty thanks for sharing that story with us. Now I have to wipe some tears out of my eyes. Abby has affected me posthumously what a wonderful companion.

[George N. M.]

I must be allergic to Frosty's stories of Abby because I keep having to wipe my eyes and blow my nose.  It's too early for hay fever season in WY.

G

[Welshj]

Some of the deepest pain and loss I ever suffered... with my best friends, as well as the most joy and love. Totally understood frosty. Thanks for sharing her story!

[SLAG]

Herr Frosty,

Is there a dry eye on the site?

I doubt it.

It is very sad when an exemplary soul passes on.

I can feel some of your pain.

The hurt may ebb given time,  but the good memories should last  as long as time allows us.

Were we closer , the bar would be open and there is plenty of single malt scotch, in there.

Hang in there chap.

I will pour a stiff measure this evening for her memory and all the memories of the good times you two/three had.

SLAG.

[Momatt]

I am very sorry for you loss. Abby must have been very special. If you are lucky, you get one like that at some point in your life. Frosty the lucky is a good name for you.
When my grandfather died, he lingered in the boundary lands between this world and the next for about 45 minutes.  At one point he threw back his head and laughed.  My aunt asked what was going on and he said I see scooby!  There are dogs in heaven!  I’ll tell you what, if scooby made it then grace abounds. I remember him he was a horrible yappy Pomeranian mutt that grandpa pretended to despise but actually loved deeply. 

Here’s to all our loyal loving friends that have passed on. All virtues of man but none of his vices. 

[George N. M.]

I shared the idea of humans being elves to dogs with my son and he sent me back the following.  The dog is speaking:

"For generations he has guarded over my family. Since the days of my great-great-great-great-great grandfather he has kept us safe.  For so long we thought him immortal.  But now I see differently, for just as my fur grows gray and my joints grow stiff, so too do his.  He did not take in my children but gave them away to his.  I will be the last he cares for.  My only hope is that I am able to last until his final moments.  The death of one of his kind is so rare.  The ending of a life so long is such a tragedy.  He has seen so much, he knows so much.  I know he takes comfort in my presence.  I only wish that I will be able to give him this comfort until the end."

It really must be early allergy season here in WY.  Nothing else would explain why I am having to wipe my eyes and blow my nose so often.

GNM 

[Hans Richter]

If you wish a lot of strength, losing a beloved pet is very bad. 

[CrazyGoatLady]

Sorry to hear this Frosty. My little Doxie will be 9 years old in July and she's had a slew of health problems in her life. If I even think about her passing, it brings tears to my eyes. 

[Frosty]

A bunch of misty eyed blacksmiths? Good thing we aren't this sensitive to minor burns. Abby was a huge soul in a furry robe, she graced everybody she met. I'm getting better about it now thanks guys this helps a LOT. 

Matt: that's a great story, reminds me of my Father's last words to me. He asked for me so he could say good bye, he'd been in failing health for a couple years. A fall put him in bed and Mother and Shannon had set up his hospital bed in the living room next to a window with a glorious view of the Columbia River. This was in E. Wenatchee Wa.  I flew down and rented a car at Sea Tac for the drive over and got there just about 11 am. 

After lunch I was trying to talk to Dad but the whole dang family kept trying to "help" till I ran them off so we could talk alone. A few last words with my father was important enough to tell Mother to take a hike. He mostly wanted to make sure I knew this was the end for him and Deb and I didn't need help.  It was the most frank and direct conversation I can remember having with him. He was relieved he could finally rest and relaxed. THEN he gave me, (HIS words) "One last piece of advice" Yes Dad? "You should gather up all the fencing and head for Oregon. Yes, that's what you should do." 

And those were Dad's last words to me. "Gather up all the fencing and head for Oregon."

 I had to leave shortly afterwards, Dad was sleeping with a small smile head turned towards his beloved Columbia River. I got a call less than an hour later that he'd passed. 

Elves to dogs, I like the metaphor George, similar to the old adage. Everyone should own a dog to know what it's like to be a god AND a cat to know for sure they are NOT. Dogs and humans have been pack for hundreds of thousands of years at least, maybe longer. I pity people who haven't lived with a dog.

Baxter our male Doxy is 10 and slowing down a little, he's no longer utterly fearless, doesn't run everywhere and has been waiting for us to bring Abby home since we didn't take him with us for the ride in the car. He's been pretty much glued to my side since Monday when we got back. Ronnie is just two and is glued to Deb. 

The grief is easing, I'm not so shocky and am actually feeling relieved Abby can rest in peace in our memories. It was time to free that great soul to serve someone else. 

Thanks guys, even her memory is powerful medicine that won't let pain last long.

Frosty The Lucky.

[rockstar.esq]

Frosty,

I'm truly sorry for your loss.  We lost a young dog to a poisonous mushroom several years back.  His last days were painful, the "false recovery" that preceded his passing felt,  just cruel. 

As I tried to console my family, I reminded them that we often find the things we're looking for.  It felt unfair that such a radiant light should go out so soon.  However, by being grateful for the time we shared with him, we honored his life by looking at life the way he did. In so doing, we could find a steady supply of things to be grateful for.  Eventually, I think we were earning the gift his life was to us.  Danged dust is in my eyes as I think of him.

 

 

[Frosty]

Thank you. While not how I would've said it, truer words were never said. I've never lived with a dog that didn't make my life better for it, even the worst one made things better. Above I talked about how much better I felt in the Hospital when she was in the room, I finally found the picture of the first time I was allowed in a wheel chair. DARN, that's not the one I was thinking of but it's her doing her thing. 

At first it was really hard to remember how much better Abby made out lives and those who met her instead of her last days. The more I tell her stories the more thankful I am we adopted her, I'd say rescued but but she rescued us really. There were a bunch of people who'd put in a deposit for her at the animal shelter, Deb was just the first. She was maybe 10 months old and surrendered. Who wouldn't have done anything to keep her is beyond me. It's hard to say "rescued" when there were people lining up to take her home and lover her. 

Deb's younger son Dan could barely stand dogs but after meeting Abby on a visit shortly after Deb and I married asked if we'd let him take her if we couldn't keep her for some reason. Since then he'd studied dogs and discovered he liked them after all and now owns a goofy lab mix rescue. Abby magic, turned a dog hater into a lover rescuer. Of course he was exposed to her "Love Me" radiation for 4 days AND he didn't like dogs so of course she stuck to him like glue, poor boy didn't have a chance.

Frosty The Lucky.